Saturday, June 18, 2011

Paperwork and Dreams

There is a lot of paperwork involved in international adoption! 

We have each written autobiographies, filled out at least a couple of dozen forms detailing all sorts of personal information, obtained copies of ALL SORTS of documents, and otherwise jumped through whatever hoops our homestudy social worker tells us we need to jump through, and all the time I am spending on all this paperwork I am thinking that I would fill out a THOUSAND forms and jump through TEN THOUSAND hoops to get you home to me, sweet Gideon!

We are finally almost ready to send all this paperwork to our social worker, and then we just wait some more.  Wait and pray.  Our boy needs our prayers.  Please remember Gideon in your prayers, dear reader!  I am a mommy who cannot hug my baby boy, and I am heartbroken whenever I think of all the hugs he has missed out on. 

I had a dream last night.  In the dream I was laying down, half-asleep, cuddling Gideon and running my fingers through his hair, feeling him breathing against my cheek, and he was SO REAL, and then I fell asleep (yes, still in my dream!) and while I was sleeping somebody snuck into my home and plucked Gideon out of my arms, and I woke up grasping for him, reaching out for him, trying to catch him, but the one pulling him away from me whisked him away into another room, put him in a crib alone, and shut the door.  I cried and cried. 

I woke up for real and cried some more. 

I miss him.  I have never met him, but in my dreams I have.  And I wish I could just go storming across the ocean today and take him home with me right now.  I cannot.  So I am storming heaven with my prayers.

1 comment:

Jill said...

I see the blog is still in progress. :) Looks great so far!

Ah, yes, the paperwork! As you said, you do whatever it takes to get your son home. Just keep good notes for yourself just in case...the 2nd time around is SOOO much easier! LOL