Thursday, October 27, 2011

SUBMITTED!

We were submitted today!  Which basically means that our huge packet of paperwork has been translated and submitted to the government of our boys' country.  So now . . . . we wait.  Some more.  Normally being submitted is a huge, exciting, pack-your-bags-get-ready-to-leave-at-a-moment's-notice type of announcement.  But not right now.  This country is not issuing travel dates right now.  Their government is in the midst of restructuring their adoption department, and everybody's paperwork, once submitted, is being held until the restructuring is complete and the new adoption department gets up and running.  We are being told it is likely to be December when they give us an appointment in their country.  Not all that much longer.  It just seems like it right now.  Because these little loves
are really starting to wonder if their new brothers will ever be home.  Poor little Josiah was getting pretty upset about it last night.  He looked like he was about to cry when he said, "Mom, are my new brothers EVER going to come home?  Cuz' I don't think they are ever really going to come.  They're not coming, Mom!  They are never coming, are they?"  

You have to understand that my kids have already lost siblings more than once . . . we have tried to adopt through foster care three times, and all three times those kids have ended up being moved to go back to biological families.  Their last loss was perhaps the worst.  Their two-year-old foster sister, whom they all adored, was moved very abruptly to return to her birth mother after we had been told for months that she would soon be free for adoption.  While we had never promised our kids that she would be their "forever sister," they talked about it constantly and assumed that she would stay.  We all did.  And when she left, our kids really grieved.  They still miss her so much.  

While our kids are very excited to get their new brothers home, and especially excited that they will be FOREVER BROTHERS and not brothers that might have to move out at any time, they are definitely feeling the stress of the uncertainty right now.  They are hesitant to even talk about the boys lately, it seems.  "Are they really coming, Mom?"  "Mom, if Gideon really comes . . ."  I hear these things all the time.  And truly, I cannot promise them anything yet.  They do know that at this point, we are HOPING to adopt these boys.  They are aware that plans could still change.  We could still be told that these boys are no longer available for adoption.  There is no reason to think that will happen, but it could.  So I have had to make sure the kids know that, too.  Because their hearts have already been broken too many times.  

Once the brothers are home, I think it will be such a relief for them to KNOW that this is different.  That this time they can really bond completely.  This time they won't have to guard their hearts.  This time there will be no social worker showing up to take their brothers back to "the other mom."  Very soon, we will know.  Very soon, we will be able to tell them, "These are your brothers forever."  But right now, the uncertainty.  It is hard to guide them through this.  It is hard for all of us.






7 comments:

Katrina said...

Oh Rachelle, So happy you have been submitted but crying for your sweet little children. We did foster care too and had 2 little girls return home. We did finally get to adopt our daughter after 2 1/2 years of grueling back and forth agony. Here is a post that I wrote about my son's poem on how he felt about the whole thing.

http://makingmanymemories.blogspot.com/2011/05/can-you-really-shield-them-from-pain.html

My children are older now so they understand that this adoption will be different. But I am praying for comfort for your little ones as they wait. Praying for your upcoming journey too.

Katrina
Carlene's soon to be momma :)
www.operationorphannomore.blogspot.com

Pam said...

So exciting to hear you've been submitted! I pray the wait won't be long and that the boys can come home soon!

Jill said...

That is great news you are submitted! Praying you hear soon about that travel date!

Anonymous said...

You are adopting two boys? PLEASE EXPLAIN.

I have only heard of Gideon/Eddie throughout this while blog?

Tyler and Ruth said...

Yeah! We're so happy for you!

rachellee said...

Reply to anonymous: Yes, we are prayerfully hoping to adopt two boys! We have not yet received the go-ahead to share details about the second child that we intend to adopt, and so we are unfortunately left speaking in rather vague, general terms in referring to our second little guy. Soon hopefully we will be able to share more specifics!

Dalas said...

It sounds like your family has been through a lot! How difficult, but also what precious children you have that care SO much. It's a blessing, even in the pain. How wonderful to know that your children will be coming home to siblings that already love them dearly.